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From the new book Lighting Your Way, With Love
It was a tremendous experience to be one of 35,000 participants at the ELCA Youth Gathering in Houston. Throughout four days of mass gatherings, we heard a variety of voices as speakers shared both their struggles and their faith. Each contributed a unique perspective to the gathering's theme of “This Changes Everything,” encouraging us to be part of a church in which everyone has a place.
For me, unquestionably, the best witness came from a little eleven-year-old girl, who was introduced by her mother. Her smile captivated the Super Bowl-sized NRG stadium. Rebekah Bruesehoff spoke with passion and clarity about the welcome she received from her parents, her church, and her God. Rebekah is transgender. Rebekah; her mom, Jamie; and her off-stage, pastor dad, Chris, all embody the critical Gospel-centric value of inclusion.
I am proud to serve as a pastor in a national church body that dares to embrace inclusion. Inviting an articulate transgender pre-teen to speak at a youth gathering was a bold move that no doubt ruffled some feathers. Though I didn't see it in the section where I was sitting, I'm told by colleagues that some adult leaders removed their groups from the arena before Rebekah and Jamie spoke. Although they received a heartfelt standing ovation from the crowd when they finished, I'm sure that not everyone was happy with what they experienced.
I must admit that the whole idea of transgender forces one to rethink traditional categories of the created order. Whereas I don't pretend to understand the reality of being transgendered or of having a transgendered child, I don't need to fully “get it” to include those who are in my definition of neighbor and church family.
When Rebekah and Jamie stood on that stage, they didn't ask for my or anyone's approval. They shared their story as a way to open hearts and minds so that there might be a greater space within the church for others with similar experiences.
They stood with courage, willing to be vulnerable for the sake of introducing themselves as God made them. No pretensions. Children of God, who also happen to be a pre-teen transgender youth and her mother. Children of God, who found a space of welcome in their Christian community. Children of God, who seek inclusion in the larger body of Christ without having first to deny themselves.
The value of inclusion is not some left-wing, secular conspiracy; rather, it is grounded firmly in scripture. Let me share a few instances. When Isaiah dreams of God preparing a mountaintop banquet, he sees all people feasting together (Isaiah 25:6). Throughout Jesus's ministry, he was continually sharing table fellowship with a diverse group of people that included self-righteous Pharisees, tax collectors, women with sullied reputations, those with physical impediments, children, and an assorted group of “unclean” characters (see Luke 5:27-39; 7:36-50;9:10-17; 14:1-6, 7-14,15-24; 19:1-10.)
Table fellowship in the Roman world conveyed with it a sort of acceptance, honor, and equal standing. When you ate with someone, you befriended them and entered into a relationship with them. Continued sharing of table fellowship solidified and strengthened social, economic, and religious bonds.
Because of this, folks heavily guarded admittance to the table. You didn't haphazardly eat with just anyone. On more than one occasion, the Pharisees reminded Jesus of the social conventions and implications of his presence at unsavory tables and his open practices of inclusive hospitality.
I'm convinced that Jesus didn't need this “helpful advice,” for he thoroughly knew what he was doing. In sharing meals and welcome with those whom society generally excluded, Jesus created a new community that has a place for everyone. Inclusion was a Jesus-value, one established centuries before any current political ideology or secular predisposition.
When the ELCA welcomed Rebekah and Jamie to the stage, the church was living out the same value of inclusion that Jesus displayed time and again when he shared an open table fellowship.
How might we do the same? How can we engage in genuine acceptance of others who may not think, act, or orient themselves as we do? What will it take for us to withhold judgment and instead extend kindness? Personally, what is getting in your way of mimicking Jesus's inclusive table fellowship? How might we follow the courageous witness of an eleven-year-old transgendered girl who was willing to be vulnerable and stood on a stage to share her beautiful smile?
A Note to My Son:
Dear Noah,
I was happy to see a lot of posters on your campus embracing the value of inclusion. I'm glad that in some places, the acceptance of differences and embracing of diversity is being held up as a goal. Not everything about our culture is terrible.
When multiple orientations, divergent identities, and various self-expressions are displayed out in the open, it will threaten some folks. They will judge. Some might even respond with harmful and hurtful words and actions.
Don't let a lack of understanding turn you away from following Jesus's path of love. Instead, use the occasion of difference as an opportunity to broaden your mind and heart. Don't ever be afraid that you will lose yourself by listening to the experience of another. You only stand to gain from a broader perspective.
Remember, inclusion is never a bad word—it is a Jesus-word.
Love you always,
Dad
Permission granted to share today's content with family and friends. Copyrighted 2018. Walt Lichtenberger
See below for details on how to purchase Lighting Your Way, With Love
When teenagers leave home, it is a time of adjustment for the whole family. Lighting Your Way, With Love helps young and old find the wisdom, courage, and faith to face what lies ahead. Walt writes from the dual-perspective of a father whose son is going off to university and a seasoned pastor who has walked with others during times of transition.
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